The Future is a Complicated Place Short AU
by LightingYourDarkness
Summary: Modern Arthur and Guinevere deal with the grief in loosing their children, Alastair and Alaina, from their times in Camelot.


Author's Note: Warning! The following thread is very sad, and slightly complicated. In this short, albeit depressing scene, you meet Arthur and Gwen dealing with the the news that both of their children have died. A&G, in this AU, live in the 2012 world but have recently learned that they are cursed to live in the future, and have flashbacks of all their past experiences in Camelot, particularly the ones of Alastair and Alaina, their children.

Arthur woke up late one night, shrugging his blanket from his shoulders in his sleep. His hand instinctively reached to where it would have locked it Gwen's, but he'd forgotten he was in the living room. Arthur blinked, and woke up. Why were his eyes so dry? Had he been...crying? It didn't make sense.

Gwen lay on her stomach, wide awake. It wasn't that she didn't want to sleep, it was more that she was scared to. The nightmares had been bad before, but now that she knew about...well, she just feared it would be worse. So she lay completely wide awake, hugging a pillow.

Arthur groaned, and found his way to the bedroom. He didn't feel like talking, in fact, barely a word had been spoken between them in days, but he just didn't want to be alone.  
"Are you alright?" Her husband finally said, coming to sit up on the bed.

"Fine." Gwen said. She still lay on her stomach, her voice slightly muffled. She wasn't crying. She didn't have any tears left.

Arthur couldn't comfort her, because everything was piling up on him, but just squeezed her hand. He hoped it was enough.

Gwen hated the silence, but what else was there to say? How was she supposed to comfort him when she couldn't comfort herself either?

He had to try. "You'll be fine. I promise." Arthur couldn't speak for himself, though, as he lay on his back, staring blindly at the canopy of their bed.

"Don't lie to me." Gwen said, rolling over to sit up, facing the opposite wall. "I don't want to hear it."

"Sorry." Arthur mumbled, covering his eyes. No matter what he did, the visions of their past never stopped. "Wishing I...could help."

"I know." Gwen said, standing. "I'm going to get something to eat."

He nodded, at least she had an appetite. Arthur had barely eaten in three days.

Gwen did go to the kitchen, but simply stood there, leaning against the counter. She sighed and looked worried.

There he was, finding himself alone again. Arthur turned over, taking a pillow from the other side of the bed. Why didn't it ever end? He'd never go back to Camelot. To most people, it was a legend lost in time, but to him it was his home, and his real life. His entire family had been there.

Gwen picked up a plate out of the cupboard and walked across the room. Before she got there, the plate slipped from her fingers and smashed across the floor. She swore, and suddenly she was crying again. It was such a stupid thing to cry over.

Arthur heard the shattering, and got out of bed. Gwen sat in the middle of the kitchen floor, in shards of glass, sobbing her little heart out. He sighed, and and carefully shoving some of the sharp pieces away, came to sit next to her. It was cautious, because he knew her moods had been unstable, but he gave her a hug. They both needed that comfort, even if words weren't involved.

Gwen didn't exactly know what was going on right now. Her emotions were completely clouding everything that she was thinking of. She only knew that Arthur's arms were around her, and she wasn't pushing him away.

Arthur wasn't being pushy, or even particularly sweet and romantic, just...stable. He wanted to be there for her. Maybe words weren't the right thing, and seeing as he had none, that was good.

"I hate this." Gwen said through her sobs as she leaned into his warmth.

He covered his eyes, not willing to show her tears. It felt wrong to have to be so weak. "I miss them."

"I hate this." Gwen repeated, pounding her fists against her knees. It seemed so pointless to her. All of it.

"I need them back." Arthur started shaking, and he couldn't stop it. Alastair and Alaina had been his children. They weren't something replaceable. He made himself stop. No, they had been their children. Gwen loved them equally as much as he had.

"I just want to forget again." It sounded awful, but Gwen would rather completely forget them than life with the hole they had left behind.

Arthur nodded, biting his lip so hard blood began to seep through the skin. "I can't do this, Gwen. I can't do this."

"Don't break down on me." Gwen whispered, "I need you." If he broke down, she'd have no one.  
When he looked up at her, his blue eyes were a teary mess. "No...I can't be strong anymore, Guinevere. I-sometimes...I...want to die. I want this to end. I want to go back to Camelot."

"I know a thing or two about wanting to die." Gwen said, pulling away from him to stand, and slowly retreating towards the bedroom.

"I wish I'd never been born." Arthur said miserably, cutting his hand on a shred of broken glass as he stood, but numbed to the pain as countless pictures of his son and daughter appeared in his mind. He couldn't escape, and part of him never wanted to.


End file.
